How to Know if you’re a Mean Mom?

You know you’re a mean mom when……

You let your child suffer natural consequences. Leave the bike out in the rain? Yep, it rusts. Say something ugly to your sister? No, she doesn’t want to play with you now.

You make your child eat leftovers (or heaven forbid, a meat sandwich instead of peanut butter and jelly).

You make your child eat strawberries without sugar (now that’s mean!) and even make them pick them!

Your child only gets 30 minutes of electronic games a day. And maybe 30 minutes of television. I know. That’s a hardship.

kids playing video games

girl playing video games

You make your child finish his schoolwork before playing. Yet as homeschoolers we have flexibility for days that fall apart and aren’t productive.

Your kids don’t have a cell phone. Don’t get me started there. My youngest are 13 and 14 and do not have a cellphone. They’re homeschooled. We’re always together. They have no need and we have no budget for it. Our family “rule” (guideline) is not until they are driving. Now we did do away with our landline so we will look at a disposable phone for S when/if she starts babysitting or is home alone.

You expect yes ma’am and no ma’am, yes sir and no sir, to all adults, not just parents. Who are we, the Duggars?

You make your children read. We taught our kids from birth that “books are our friends.”

You monitor their Halloween candy. Yes, that’s monitor not keep it away from them. They need to learn how to make good choices with food so they get to practice with candy.

“All the other kids are doing it” and your child isn’t. This can apply to most everything, including playing sports, taking instrument lessons, art classes, three languages and going to the mall on the weekends.

Your kids wear clothes from yard sales and thrift stores. Mine go with me and are learning the thrill of the hunt and the reward for persistence. They appreciate it so much more when they see the work and decisions that go into the possessions they have.

You only give your child a small amount of money each week for allowance because that’s all you can afford. My kids need to learn how to manage their money, whether it’s $3 or $30. Having money involves making choices and learning responsibility. They can practice with any amount.

Your child has to do chores. And that doesn’t even cover cleaning their own room. These are “family” chores, like folding laundry, vacuuming, sweeping, cleaning bathrooms. Yup, I’m that mom.

kids doing chores

Are you a mean mom, too? Congratulations, mom, you rock!

Would you like to know more about a day in the life of a homeschooler?

How about the lessons learned in a corn maze?

Join us as put real life homeschooling and coupon math to the test.   

Linking with: Hip Homeschool Moms, 3 Boys and a Dog, The Modest Mom Blog, ABC and 123, Cornerstone Confessions, Weird , Unsocialized Homeschoolers 

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Comments

  1. From one mean Mom to another, godd job! Miss you.

  2. My kids are all grown but I was a mean mom. And you know what? I raised five wonderful citizens who know the value of a dollar, understand service to others, work hard for what they want or need, never have been arrested, don’t do drugs, vote in every election, and are a joy to my heart and soul. And they are mean moms, too!!
    Good job, Marty! What the world needs is a lot more mean moms!

    • Thanks, Sandra! I figured you would be a mean mom, too! Sometimes the world intrudes so much on our ideals that we fall prey to the “easy” way. You and I both know the hard way is well wroth it in the end, for both our children and us. Have a blessed day!

  3. I’m definitely a mean mom. I’m not great at everything and I question everything that I do on a daily basis…and I beat myself up…but my kids are well behaved (even if not perfectly behaved). I’ve been complimented when out in public. They are kind. They are sweet. They are eleven months apart and a handful. Every single day I have to choke back the tears as I think of all the things I could have done better and that I’m not able to give them music and art classes and that I can’t be a homeschooling mom. BUT, I am thankful on a daily basis that He provides me with the hugs and the love that they need. So grateful for being a mom…even on days when I am scared that I’m ruining them for life.

    • Sweet Dorcas, I hope you will be encouraged today, knowing that God gave your children to you for a reason. To bless you and help you grow in ways you never imagined! Having adult children has helped me to see that it is a daily process of surrendering them and doing my best and knowing that God loves them even more than I do. Your kids don’t need things. Homeschooling isn’t for everyone. They need to know they are loved, and it’s obviously by your comment that they are. God bless you today!

  4. Mean mom=loving mom.

    Raised by a mean mom, and I’m one most of the time, too. In fact, I’m getting ready to put the Halloween candy out of reach! And I took away TV today, too.

    Some days, I’m meaner than others. :)

    • Good for you, Amy, putting that candy out of reach. I went away for the weekend, left it out and about 3 pounds of chocolate high tailed it out of here. Of course, my kids had a little help from their dad!

  5. Love it! Made me smile. You KNOW how awfully mean I am. And I’m apparently attracted to other mean moms too. :-)

  6. Sandra Bowman says:

    I love finding out that I’m not the only mean mom in the world. My son doesn’t watch television during the week. He’s only six but he certainly doesn’t have a cell phone (well one that works anyway), a television in his room, an Ipod touch, a computer, or any video games. He asked why one of the kids in his class got to watch the television show The Walking Dead. I told him I didn’t know what it was about but that it was neither appropriate for me or him to watch. I’m also married to a mean dad. One day we were at Walmart and were getting ready to walk out when my husband asked my son to carry a bag for me, which contained only a loaf of bread. He refused and my husband took the DVD that we just bought our boy back in the store and got our money back.

  7. Love it! I’m just starting to be a mean mom. My son is only 2 and doesn’t understand a lot of consequences (he hit his baby brother and then said “what happened?” when he started crying) but I am making him clean up the messes he makes!

  8. Our kids could relate–I’m a mean mom, too. Especially when it comes to the TV and cell phone issue. Loved this post! I (Visiting from Titus 2 Tuesday link up and new follower on pinterest & twitter).Blessings, Gin

  9. ::snicker:: Wow! You are mean! ::wink:: I guess that makes me mean too, huh? ::laugh::

  10. I get the humor in this post but I certainly don’t consider myself mean. I consider myself serious about the responsibility that God has blessed me with to raise loving, thoughtful, wise, productive Godly Seed and I do take that very seriously. However, in this day and time by the things that we choose to do, not “to” our kids, but “for” kids…this crazy society certainly considers us mean…don’t they. Cute post!

    • Thanks for commenting, Stephy. My “mean” mom post is written slightly tongue in cheek, because according to the world’s standards I am mean. We set limits and boundaries and do our best to teach our children about gratitude. I also take this responsibility seriously, as do you. I just jokingly say I’m always the meanest mom around. Our kids have to work for things simply because it’s financially necessary and it teaches them to appreciate what they have earned. You keep doing a great job, okay!

  11. I’m pretty mean, too then! ;)
    It does get hard sometimes to maintain boundaries when “everyone else” is doing it. We run into that a great deal more with our 17yo, mostly because we didn’t raise her the first 14 years of her life, so our ideas are still somewhat foreign concepts for her. And I know she thinks we are unreasonable and “mean” sometimes. {sigh} But we do what we have to do!

    • Thanks for visiting Marty’s Musings, Jamie. I completely understand about your older daughter, because we have three adopted children. It is very hard to have family expectations and responsibilities when their first few years were completely different. You just keep doing what you know is right. Blessings!

  12. This is such a great post! SO nice to meet a fellow mom of teens. Stopped by from Hip Homeschool Moms. :)

  13. shauna marie says:

    thanks, you rock too! :)

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