Lessons Learned in a Corn Maze
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What do you do when you want to find a fun activity for your family? You buy a Groupon, of course! I purchased a buy one get one free groupon for the local corn maze in our area. Thinking I was being smart, I bought two deals which gave me four tickets. That was for us and our younger two. I had already talked to our married duaghter and she and her husband wanted to come. Not sure what I was thinking, but when Living Social came out with the same deal I bought two more (four more tickets) . Knowing my son would be home for fall break, I now had a total of eight tickets. We invited his girlfriend to come stay with us so were set for a fall adventure to the corn maze!
I had seen pictures of the maze and understood the general idea. I had even thought through that each group should have a cell phone (so the youngest two could have access) in case someone got lost. I even reminded everyone to wear tennis shoes and bring water. (I’m such a good scout leader. Not.) What I didn’t think about was how long it was. Several miles as it turned out (depending on how lost you got).
Ahhh, a beautiful hot fall day. Can you picture it?
One hubby promising not to complain at my crazy idea of family togetherness.
One married couple bickering (hint in the background).
One couple with a sickie (my college son).
One person carting around a heavy camera (yeah, that was me) and a quick pair up at the start that left me with youngest son:
“Mr. Impatient/I WIll Win if it kills me/oh no, I’ve got Mommy on my team” son is off to the races and I’m looking around to see where everybody went.
I didn’t even know you could get scared in a corn maze because I’m the “Rule Follower/Can’t possibly cheat and go through the cornstalks/Now I’m hyperventilating/Mom.” Really. There was a moment where I felt like the kid that had been left behind in a department store. So I hollered for my son and gave him a lecture talking to about working together as a team.
We proceeded into the maze and wandered for a while until someone else told us a clue was around the corner. Oh, did I forget to tell you the object of the maze was to find clues at six different stations, allowing you to answer the riddle (something about who killed somebody and where? Actually, it was a farm animal killed and you’re supposed to find the weapon, the suspect and the location). Hmmm. Who cares? One guess. My son does and he’s on a pursuit to find the clues.
Did I tell you it was hot? And I’m way older than my youngest? Yes, we wandered around…….and around…….and around.
We had four clues and I needed to rest. Or at least catch my breath.
Every other word out of son’s mouth was, “I know where we are. We’re not lost.”
Well, of course, son. There’s the map. Piece of cake.
It was all good until I committed the deadly sin.
I asked for help.
For my attachment challenged (healing RAD) adopted son this is pretty close to treason. Kids that have a trauma background believe they don’t need any help, because they weren’t taken care of or had their needs met in their early months/years. Asking for help is a sign of weakness to them.
We had come to a point where the maze owners had employees stationed to guide people to clues or the way out. I asked for help while I was stopped, and my son got very mad at me. We had tense words with each other in the middle of a row of corn, which was compounded by the fact that I had received a call saying one of the other teams had finished first. (Later found out they took a cellphone pic and were gathering clues by looking at the map on their phone.)
The great thing about this adventure for my youngest son and I? We worked through it. In the middle of the corn field. I told him how tired I was and the fact that I was getting a migraine. He was upset that I didn’t tell him earlier because he would have slowed down and not been so anxious to win.
This is progress for us. Serious progress. I told him how proud I was that he was able to work together as a team with me and if he would give me a moment we could get the last two clues.
Here’s what I learned during our corn maze adventure:
Lessons Learned in the Corn Maze:
Being a part of a team means leading at times and following at others.
Asking for help may be humbling but often will be part of the solution.
Finishing the race can be just as important as winning.
Time spent together is a reward in itself.
Letting go of control and letting your family into your heart is worth the struggle and pain.
God gives us opportunities to learn, in every single situation, if we let Him.
Healing, like running the race, takes an investment of time and heart, but it will yield rich blessings in the end.
Linking with: Homegrown Learners, Living Life Intentionally, Weird Unsocialized Homeschoolers, A Mama’s Story, The Modest Mom Blog, What Joy Is Mine, Time-Warp Wife, Cornerstone Confessions, ABC and 123, Fireflies and Jellybeans, 3 Boys and a Dog, Intentional Me, Leaving a Legacy, Homemaker by Choice, MercyINK
Thank you so much for linking up in Homeschooling on the Cheap! I love this post and it is featured today in the new HOTC linky! Thanks again, Kelli
http://3boysandadog.com/deals/2012/homeschooling-on-the-cheap-november-8-2012
Marty! I’m so glad to meet another mom-blogger-w/RAD-kids! Not many of us can take/make time to do anything with all the emotional work of the homefront. I’ve got two fost/adopt daughters and we still deal with RAD issues 8 years later. (That was one of our top discussion points in my oldest’s IEP meeting yesterday…) In any case, love that you committed treason and asked for help. It’s so scary to stretch our kids, who have broken at similar points in the past, little by little. Way to finish the maze!!
Thanks so much for commenting, Laurie. I blog about many things but my heart is for the mom struggling with RAD/emotional issues because the journey is so hard. We’re 12 years into it and have seen such great progress, but there are still remnants of lies that were placed on their hearts at such an early age. God is the divine healer and I pray He does the same with your children!
Great story! How good it is when we can keep our heads and remember the goal–not to win, but to build a lovin relationship! I’m visiting through Teach Me Tuesday. I’d love if you’d give me a visit back!
I’m so glad you visited my blog, Sharon. God is good at teaching us through relationships, isn’t he?
Back when I was a youth director there was a maze nearby. It was one made of wood panels. It had a big tower in the center. There were no maps, but it also had stations each station had a paper punch with a different shape and so the goal was to get all your punches and get out. I wrote a curriculum in which I divided my kids into groups of three. (throwing in an adult or two if I needed to.) Each kid was assigned to be an A, B or C with each team having one of each. Then we separated them into three groups for the assignments. (they had no clue what was going on at this point) The B kids were each given a punch card and told to find all the punches and then get out. The C kids were told that they would be up on the tower and it was their job to help the B kid on their team find all the punches and the way out. Here is the fun part. The A kids were also sent up to the tower, but they were told that they were secretly their own team. Their job was to not let anyone finish the maze. They should primarily focus on their own B person but the could help each other as well. We did tell them that they were not allowed to touch the C people. So no hands over mouths or anything. We set them to go and it was chaos. Two thirds of the kids up on the tower yelling. (we rented the whole thing for the evening, no one else was there) The B kids hadn’t realized people would be on the tower so it took them a minute to start listening. The C people were totally confused by why the A people were giving wrong directions. It was funny cause the most aggressive kids and the leaders had all ended up being A. (most of them “called it” even though they had no idea what A, B or C would get to do) Afterwards we sat down and talked about it. The B kids talked about how they had to figure out first off which voice was talking to them and second which one was really trying to help them and how to tune out the other voices. The C people talked about how hard it was to get the B people to listen. A couple of the A ones felt bad. We talked about how hard it is to listen for God’s voice when so many other things are trying to get our attention and how sometimes it’s hard to know which voices are actually trying to help us and stuff. It turned out to be a great discussion.
I love your creativity in the activities you’ve led, Lorraine. Kids (and even adults) love being competitive, don’t they?
Oh that looked like such fun. I miss those days of the kids still around. Your Blessed enjoy them! And thanks for sharing.
We are indeed blessed, with both teenagers and adult children. The corn maze was definitely a new activity for us!
What a special memories you’ve given your family. I love how you didn’t allow the frustrations to spoil your day but worked through it and finished strong.
Thanks, Pamela. I’ve realized as I get older it’s not really what we do, but that we’re all together. Ah, the benefits of aging!
Marty,
What a fun family outing! I just love the subtitles under the pictures!! I remember my mom wanting to do stuff like that and we just dreaded it outwardly, but secretly, we loved it only because we were together as a family. You have such an amazing family and I know they all are blessed to have such a thoughtful mom!!
My kid look forward to doing our local corn maze every year – their fav!!! What a fun activity and memory!!
Thanks for linking up to TGIF! Have a GREAT weekend,
Beth =-)
This was our first and we might not do it again for a while, but it was good fun!
What a cool story! So glad I stopped by from the Weekly Wrap-up. Looks like, overall, a successful outing and a [mostly] good time.
It was a fun day, but it would have been better if it was not quite so hot! It’s hard to find something all of us can enjoy. Thanks for stopping by.
My husband is like your youngest, he takes the clues, route very seriously. 🙂 Of course I’m always glad to have him along or else I’d be in deep water…er corn, for days.
The last picture is so awesome, I know everyone of you must love it!
Thanks, Rosey! My son is a serious competitor but he’s learning how to be on a team. That took a while!
That is a funny story. My hubby and I are actually going to a corn maze this weekend. We used to go annually but have not been in the last two year due to moving. Corn mazes, I feel, are necessary for any relationship. It will definitely test it and show your weaknesses and strengths.
Stopping by from the Friday Chaos linkup.
This is a lovely post. Corn Mazes make me crazy! Kudos to the brave and patient mother! Is the last picture a before or an after picture? Either way, beautiful family!
What a wonderful last picture — and I just loved reading your post. You are so wise.
Thank you for linking with Collage Friday!
We go corn-amazing every year, and run our boy ragged by sending him in one direction while I go in another. He sleeps good the night we go. 🙂 Enjoyed reading about your adventures. Love you, my friend.
LOVE it!
🙂 🙂 🙂
Being the owner of a corn maze, that was fun to read! I’m glad you had a good time and I’m glad you are a rule follower and didn’t cut through the corn!! Looks like a good time!
Danni, that’s so funny that you own a maze! Now I’m kind of humbled! It was my first experience there (all of ours) and it was a bit of work (I’m terrible at it). But it was a great lesson for my son and I! Thanks so much for sharing1